Hal Borland:  “Summer is a promissory note signed in June, its long days spent and gone before you know it, and due to be repaid next January.”

Brendan Behan:  “I have a total irreverence for anything connected with society except that which makes the roads safer, the beer stronger, the food cheaper and the old men and old women warmer in the winter and happier in the summer.”

Look out, Champ, we’re coming back! That’s right, the Malden Yacht Club is heading back to Lake Champlain to extend our trail northward, and if Champ know what’s good for him, he would worry away the weekend in Whitehall while we wander Willsboro’s whereabouts. Not that we would do Champ any harm. It’s just that Champ’s love for the water and enormous mythical stature, despite an obvious reluctance for the limelight, would seem to make him one of us … and I don’t have a T-shirt that would fit. So, Champ, to save both of us from the embarrassment that could come when I can’t convey that coveted covering, I think you should head to the south part of Lake Champlain during the weekend of August 28, 29, and 30, and we will patrol the north end. In fact, let me tell you exactly where we will be, and that way you may be sure to avoid an awkward faux pas while we will avoid your awkward faux paws. Continue reading ‘The Chumps Chase Champ, Champlain Campaign’ »

Benjamin Disraeli:  “My idea of an agreeable person is a person who agrees with me.”

Steven Wright:  “I’m writing an unauthorized autobiography.”

Astute readers will have noticed that there was no blolumn posted on the blog last Saturday, but then again, astute readers don’t visit this blog, so it looks like I wasted another golden opportunity to dazzle my public with a brilliant opening sentence. Oh, well. Nevertheless, the fact remains that there was no new material last week, and in case you are wondering why (now that you have read this admission, without contrition, of an edition rendition omission), let me assure you that the cause of this tradition abolition was simply composition inanition. I was blogstipated. Hard as it may be to believe, even philosophizers who create in the shadow of an outhouse sometimes have this problem. Lucky for me, I received just the right tonic to get things moving again, and lucky for everyone else, I can share the results with you. Continue reading ‘The Malden Maine Event’ »

Rita Rudner:  “I love being married. It’s so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.”

Adrienne E. Gusoff:  “Any woman who thinks the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach is aiming too high.”

Today is July 4th, a day whose significance need not be stated. Nor should it be understated. For those of us living in the USA, today is that one out of 365 that is the embodiment of the many precious individual liberties that we receive as a birthright. Today is too important a day for me to treat with anything other than the absolute respect that it deserves, which presents a bit of a quandary for me. When it comes to writing, I am definitely a one trick pony … if there isn’t a large amount of facetiousness involved, then there is a good chance that I didn’t write it. Yet my schedule calls for me to post something today, so what am I to do? Rumor has it that Ben Franklin had a sense of humor, so maybe I should not rule out frivolity entirely. Perhaps I can describe a different day in which courageous revolutionaries rebelled against authority, but one which does not quite demand the same deferential treatment as the 4th of July. Then, if I poke some fun at what happened on that occasion, I could hope to create a contrast that would highlight the serious manifestations that followed events of 233 years ago, on this, the pinnacle of all Independence Days. Folks, it just so happens that I have in mind a day that is memorable in the annals of the Malden Yacht Club, and that fact alone makes it suitable for a bit of lampooning. Now if I can only find a picture of Moe, Curly and Larry with a fife, drum and flag … Continue reading ‘Celebrating Sunday Mornings On The River’ »